Riddles

Woo! Someone other than me likes Scritti Politti (waves to Ame ^__^)!

Aaaaanyway (deja vu? yeah). Today's been a rollercoaster ride, admittedly. Two of my least favourite cretins in the entire universe have come back to MeTV... ah well. I'm not cretinous, and they ARE! Mwahahahahaha! My "revelation" still isn't apparent to everyone yet, except for two. One uses MeTV, one doesn't, but I didn't think I made it that obvious - though they're good people, they wouldn't mind ^_^

Riddles aside, happiness flooded my brain today as my 7th favourite band ever, Hue & Cry, made it through to the final of ITV's Hit Me Baby One More Time, the show where pop hasbeens come back from the dead. My vote COUNTS, damnit!

Not much really happening in my life currently. My 18th approaches ever nearer and my thoughts for celebrations wax and wane like the effervescent moon. I think I'm gonna stick at it with the Pizza Hut do'. By god, I'm bored, I REALLY can't think of anything to fill the blog with tonight! It seems my life has actually hit a normal straight for the first time in ages... guess I should be grateful, but I'm not experiencing any fun in my life... I'm spending FAR too much time sat at the PC at the minute. Oh well... the coming of age, the coming of a new stage in life?

Bollocks.

Heathcliff

Hazard

i'm not feeling on as high a crest as I was yesterday, though I'm still feeling quite light and strange inside. Had a rather important conversation via that wonderful device known as MSN about my "inner searching", and it's proved useful. MeTVers will know more very soon, some of my MSN contacts may already know, those around me may hazard a wild guess, but..... wait and see. It's not illegal, taht's all I'm saying. ;)

Not that bad a day at ze grind today, although to be honest I can do without a 90-minute slog through the Magic of Shakespeare on a Friday morning... that's the only downside to studying english, you have to study someone else's work, which may or may not be a big festering pile of raw crap (William Goulding and Carol Ann Duffy in opposite circumstances) - still, syllabus is syllabus. I guess.

My recent highs have been brought down by incessant worry, though I'm a born worrier so don't you all go fretting, y'hear? Another weekend looms... I've got sod all planned, as usual, so I'm gonna see if I can get one or two of my mates round... I sorta feel sorry for disrupting their schedule, and kinda selfish.

Haven't you got it yet? I need a frickin' girlfriend! Moan, moan, moan. my bowels have been playing up again, GRRRR! That's the way the are, c'est la vie, but I'm getting sick and tired of relying on Weetabix in one extreme and having to sit on towels and discarded garments in the other. My life's one big hassle, don't let it get in your way :D

Right, I'd best go promote this, as people'll still think it's dead. IIA.

Heathcliff

Vanity

"Let me tell you somethin'.... bloggin' makes me feel good!"

Aaaanyway. Today hasn't been half bad. The past couple of days I've been on an exciting voyage of self-discovery, which I'm not quite ready to disclose all about yet, but I'm brimming with inner happiness and consecutive vanity - so much so that I no longer feel compelled to skip "Rock DJ" by Robbie Williams if my winamp spits it at me (my Winamp is called "Henry", so if I refer to it a sthat in future blogs you'll know what the chuff I'm talking about)! Mondo Bizarro! My hair's naturally fluffing up into a Nik Kershaw style bombsite rather than the gloomy "Hives" style bubble which glues itself to the side of my head. I'm hella glad I don't have sideburns.

Been working on my musical project, "Big Neighbourhood", recently, whilst balancing a Cats incorporated spinoff of sorts - comrade Trevor is the second member of BN, though his sadistic workload at the minute is seriously limiting him - bloody college. It's psychology work, at least I presume - the topic of overkill and overdemanding deadlines. Though all tutors are evil, to a certain extent. :) I'll have an official BN site or forum or whatever up soon and let any of you regular visitors know of my actions...

I finally left radio in February and needless to say I feel slightly liberated - I can GO HOME ON WEDNESDAY AFTERNOONS! You people with free time allocated therein don't know how bloody lucky you are. However, three more have left the station since my abrupt departure, meaning that I've created some sort of revolution...

Oops.

Still, life goes on. I'm eighteen in just over a fortnight, planning to go over to the frig-off-awesome Pizza Hut located in the awkward Harborough Hills "retail park" area of Barnsley town centre on my free wednesday. ^________________^ I hope also to find a relationship by the end of this year, scratch hope, I'm DETERMINED. Damnit! I may be an ugly bastard for frig's sake but that doens't mean I'm unattractive...

... or maybe not. Anyway, I'd best get off and do something completely pointless. Instantum Illumiaris Abraxas, Bis Morgen, Wally Watchers.


Heathcliff

HAH!

IT'S BACK! And you thought I'd left it to die... DIDN'T YOU?

Well, truth be told, I did. But now I have my pc in my room with net access, I can blog more easily and frequently, so HAH!

It's a shame i've got nothing to talk about on my comeback post. Ah well, let's see what tomorrow delivers...

Tschuss!

Heathcliff

Pudding

My apologies. I've really let things slip again, due to my not being arsed to blog and only remembering to do it at the last minute. From now on, I'm not going to blog on a daily basis or bi-daily basis, I'm going to blog whenever the hell I feel like it and whebever something major in my life unfolds (you could have a long wait, but who knows?).

The top 25 thing has also been suspended until I can fully get my "peeved" project up off the ground after christmas (you can see developments already at http://peeved/blogspot.com).

Nothing much else has been happening, otherwise. Just limbering up for Christmas and the overall hideousness of tomorrow, which features the regular hell of my English lesson and a bus service which has become incorrigably useless. I ahve a feeling that tomorrow may be the worst day in my college life ever, but we shall have to wait and see if the proof is in the pudding.

Heathcliff

Gristle

Wow... today was one long boring trawl... virtually no college at all today, I should be happy, but I've got to share my English class tomorrow with a thoroughly dislikeable degenerate who finds it amusing that i am socially inept. Maybe that's one more thing to add to the end of my "to do before I die" list - wreak revenge upon those who have opposed me (though within means of the law, of course - I'm not a bloody psychopath - and besides, death would be far too much of a luxury for some of these people)... oh well, dire thoughts I guess. Spending the next couple of days with Chad, should take my mind of trivial affairs such as mentioned.

HEATHCLIFF PRESENTS 25 THINGS WHICH NARK ME OFF!
#2 - BUS DRIVERS
Don't get me wrong, not all bus drivers are surly, malevolent and sadistic. It's only the 80% majority. The job of a bus driver is to escort local people to areas which they cannot access via walking for a small fee - however, the majority of bus drivers I have had to deal with all treat their customers as if they are the bane of their existence rather than their trade! It beggars belief how a bus driver can sit at the wheel with the bus doors shut with people outside waiting to get on, trying to complete the daily crossword puzzle. And then, to add insult to injury, they bite our heads off and swallow the gristle by moaning at us when we don't state where we want to go correctly, or if a passenger is too slow getting on the bus, or if they have to deal with - horror of horrors - a pound coin rather than exact change! I'd like to point one fact out to bus drivers in general - you may be pissed off, and have had a bad day dealing with hordes of pensioners and hood-wearing monstrosities, but frankly, that doesn't mean that everyone else is having the time of their lives - some of us have to work the exact same hours as you! Basically, two qualifications are needed to become a bus driver - you need to be able to drive, and you also need to be a miserable bastard who hates everyone and everything. That's from what I've seen, anyway.


You can now view my 25 pet peeves and much more as I type them via my pet project at http://peeved.blogspot.com. Ciao, peoples.

Heathcliff

Bigotry

Wow, I haven't updated in almost a week... getting slack again. I did keep forgetting, though.... mind lapsing is my excuse this time around.

No radio tomorrow, so short day for me.... despite the fact that I've still got to bloody get up at 7am and catch a bus full of mangy face-eating troglodytes whose career lies either at a "technical college" or via part of an anti-establishment brigade. Don't get me wrong, antidisestablishmentarianism is perfectly fine, I myself am committed to create a gung ho clan of new-age travellers before the age of 50 alongside my writing aspirations in order to flush out the bigotry of the upper classes and earn me and my plucky warriors peerages, albeit slightly dubious ones.

And now, as it is the run up to Christmas, I've decided to do something daily via my blog, "advent-calendar-style". I've been motivated in the past to do a top 100 countdown and comment on each entry until the day arrives, but instead, i ahve decided to start a mini-column - 25 THINGS WHICH NARK ME OFF! Each day until christmas eve I shall be, as well as blogging, hosting a pet peeve per day and having a good old rant! Here's the first! The peeves aren't in any specific order, just randomly thrown together...

HEATHCLIFF PRESENTS: "25 THINGS WHICH NARK ME OFF"
#1 - BAKISM
"Public Bakism" is a term coined by my good associate Trevor (who also coined the phrases "I need to knock a shunt off" and "I've got a turtle-head poking out"). Public bakists are young couples who insist on french-kissing "passionately" in front of everybody and not giving a toss. They literally sit there, eating each other's faces, whilst we (those of us with slightly more dignity as to chew the inner lip of our current beau) have to sit around drinking our coffees, reading our gossip rags, pretending noit to notice that there is a pair of shameless tongue-masticating dolts who are as close to having casual sex as is possible in public without having the people around them being accused of "dogging" (although they'd need a car for that - my excuse would be that I was merely badger-spotting... although, it didn't work for the Welsh Secretary..). These people need shooting with a hallucinogenic dart, a slap round the face with a wet side of plaice and a healthy dose of common decency crammed down their throats. I sound like a complete bigot, put these people REALLY get my back up.

TOMORROW: What's malicious, middle-aged and gets you to Royston in 20 minutes providing they can be arsed to put down the Times Crossword puzzle?

Instantum Illuminaris Abraxas, Wally watchers.

Heathcliff

Philosophy

Big changes in radio today. I was one of the only people not to be given a specific role, mainly as I am not returning to barnsley College next year - despite being told that the few of us who didn't get a designated post were "crucial", I still felt a little pissed off, but I've decided "what the hell, f**k it", and will slog on with the shows, regardless of how much effort i put into being part of teh community. I show up on a wednesday and a friday to do my show, that's it - my philosophy from now on. I'm sick and tired of my mind thinking "should I quit?" when I really don't think I should (Chad has now been made "Features Editor", so I guess that portion of my show won't be as stressful)... you know what, f**k it! I've been there well over a year now, and there's no point me giving up the whole charade now - although as the other members of teh group all have high roles and are connected with the project day in day out, i really don't need to show much commitment any more. Which is a good thing, I guess (at one point I actually blurted out "I feel as if I've ran a marathon, got within a metre of the finishing line but have been knocked down and raped before I could reach it". Thankfully not many heard me - that's the beauty of communism - although it goes to show my mingled feelings of jealousy and anger brew up quite quickly)... gives me more time to worry about things which concern me more within my own department.

All i want to do now is go to Huddersfield University, grow my hair long, wear an eyepatch, get a girlfriend and erase the years 1999-2003 from my mind completely. That's all i want right now. And if anyone's going to try and stop me along the way, I will react so badly that not even my own brain will be responsible for the breakdown I shall suffer henceforth.

Heathcliff

Euphemism

Uh-oh. Emotions running high again. Not so much angry these last couple of days, but an odd mix of sadness, longing and jealousy. The latter emotion I have no idea where is coming from... the others, I suppose I'd best stop listening to slow ballads and welling over things too much. Not that I mind, I like this side of me (not the jealousy side, THAT i can do without), it just re-affirms that I'm human like everyone else... someday, I'll find my Queen (according to my objectives list, within the next 5 years, hopefully)....

Otherwise, radio is narking me off again. My two shows last weeke were admittedly cancelled, but I'll slog on regardless. Right now, I've got to plan for taking part in a film for my mate Trevor, I'm playing one half of a spoof goth duo. The problem is, make-up takes ages to get off and i ahven't got ANYTHING in the way of "Gothy" stuff... oh well, serves me right for being a Gartside*.

Right now I plan to write something, either continuing with my novel or my serial, I haven't decided yet... got a few stress-free days ahead, thankfully. I don't even have to think about Wuthering Heights until the weekend (although, given my name, it's a wonder I don't think about every day, like...). I'm just gonna sit back and listen to Nat King Cole for a while before checking my ebay garb and doing some writing before bed.

Instantum Illuminaris Abraxas, Wally Watchers!

Heathcliff

*A term I just made up, derived from Scritti Politti frontman Green Gartside, meaning "one who is obsessed about the 1980s to the point of extremity and is of an androgynous personality, or likes to think they are, despite looking and sounding awfully like the gender they were originally designated at birth, although not wanting to change gender in the long-term, and love sthe sound of saxophones mixed with outdated yamaha keyboards and curly blonde haircuts." Go me. I'm trying to phase it in as a euphemism. I'll keep you posted!

Ramsay'd

Hidehi campers! Been engrossed in audioscrobbling as of late. I suggest you visit www.audioscrobbler.com to see what I'm talking about... or, even better, www.audioscrobbler.com/user/heathcliff_2040 - if you DARE...

Good news first, got my offer through from Huddersfield University - I honestly didn't expect anything so early (Derby has also offered me a place - which I will choose to ignore simply because I put it down as a back-up choice, and it turns out it's actually harder to get in THERE than Huddersfield!). Will be replying to the offers as soon as i've got my head around the logistics, and will pray for a pass in Politics despite my tutor being an absolute arsehole (my Dad had a run-in with him at second years' parents evening the other night! Cyril recalls seeing my dad keep his hands firmly behind his back at all times before being subjected to an "interesting" chat with the master of anal retention and self-obsessive ideals, herr tutor. I decided not to go, the reasons are probably obvious why). It's by no means time to celebrate yet though, however. I've got to pass the exams first, which is no mean feat.

My emotions have entered a strange area I like to call "The Heathcliff Zone" over the last couple of days, my emotions have amounted to the following, in order of most prominent: Annoyed, Harrassed, Pissed Off, Peeved, Aggravated, Ticked Off, Bulwarked, Mentally Emancipated, Bumped off the left side of the bed, Cheesed Off, Bottled Up, Gruntworthy, Grievous, Ramsay'd, F**ked Off, Made Malicious, and Rendered Pissed. Basically, this week has been one aggravation after another (it was a long way of going around saying it, true), mainly thanks to my Radio group which has gotten me worried and then let me down again. having spent the week fretting over how I shall do my broadcasts, wednesday's session was cancelled due to an overpowering stench of faeces eminating from the male cubicles (resulting in the hasty dismissal of much of that particular college department), and friday's session being dropped due to a "leak in the studio". Whether this means everything's fused and the whole she-bang is toast or not, I've no idea. I doubt it, but time will tell.

I have decided to set myself some lifetime goals. They are, currently, as follows:
1. Get into university
2. Learn to drive by 40
3. Be in a relationship by 19
4. Get married by 25 (you may scoff, I'm by no means a chav, I just feel commitment is the way forward)
5. Be a father by mid-30s
6. Be on a decent wage packet by 50
7. Humiliate at least one of my teenage tormentors as an act of revenge via a school reunion by the age of 40
8. Add "Heathcliff" as a middle name via deed poll
9. Write a bestseller
10. Die of old age
11. Have this blog published as a book, which shall be entitled "Ooh, don't mind if I do" (though obviously before #10, unless someone does it posthumously for me... my estate :))

Simple? I think so. Let me know what you think. Sayonara.

Heathcliff